To expect….is to destruct

We are going to celebrate our 6th anniversary 'together'. Never realized how time passed by so eventfully. My boyfriend has always been very different, I am still puzzled if I actually love him for that or hate him. Where I am the mushy mushy kind he hates public or private display of emotions (the romantic kind I mean). So getting back to one of our previous anniversaries I was all hyped about it and I meticulously planned the whole day from the time I got up to the time I went back to sleep and it was going to perfect…just perfect.

On that auspicious day I woke up early because I could not sleep the previous night , I wanted to be at my best. I styled my hair a thousand times and I keep gazing at myself till I felt the mirror might crack. I also had the perfect gift flowers and chocolates (I know its weird but who says only guys can gift em?) and I was on my way.

I wanted to surprise him but not actually surprise him if u know what I mean, I mean surprise him because he might not be expecting me so early but I did not want him to be completely surprised because I expected him to remember our anniversary … I mean who would forget such an important date, right?

I pressed the door bell expecting a surprise myself but my curiosity kept feeding when even after two three rings he didn’t open the door. I was just about to leave when the most horrific sight met my eyes.

I stared at him open mouthed as he stood in front of me all sleepy eyed and messy hair..he had not even woken up!. Tears stung my eyes as I stood there staring at his face, the flowers and chocolates felt so heavy that I just wanted to fling them at him.

“Hi” he mumbled wondering why I am staring down his throat in the wee hours of morning. I didn’t say anything I was still reeling under the shock.

“Do you remember what today is?” I enquired my voice quivering.

“ Aaaaaa” he said scratching his head and looking at me quizzically.

Ok, I thought that’s it! I had been humiliated enough. “Happy anniversary” I barked and thrust the flowers angrily to him and walked off. I did walk off in a huff but as I walked down the lane tears of absolute anguish wet my cheeks. “How could he do this to me?” I wondered. How could he forget that it was our anniversary? Is it not a time to celebrate? It was just beyond me as to why he would not make an effort to at least remember!

I cried the whole day and never attended any of his calls. All my plans went down the drain. I forgave him later but the same saga followed year after year including my yearly outburst. But not this year I did not plan anything for our anniversary in fact I have deliberately tried to forget when the date falls (if that is possible) ..no its not revenge its just that I feel I have pushed him enough to be what he is not, if he is not the romantic type then I should accept him that way.

That’s what love is all about isn’t it? To give with no expectations right?(Ya sure!)