I don’t know when this bug sets in but once your bitten by it your partner is in for a lot of trouble. I was like that once upon a time but I have grown out of it and it was not easy. When a person gets into a relationship it is not unusual that either the girl or the guy gets possessive if you ask me is it encroaching your freedom.. I would say no. I will explain the reason why.I have always been someone who has been very self conscious and with a high dosage of feeling inferior so much so that I used to shirk away from talking to people. When my Prince Charming entered my life he was the first guy who spoke to me and it flattered me so much that I could not sleep the whole night. I kept wondering why it that he spoke to me of all people.
Then as our relationship progressed began all the trouble, I became very insecure and I mean really insecure! You will not believe the kind of atrocities I subjected him to. I know I would be trashing my image but I want you all to know and not to repeat what I did.
He loves computers, they are like his mistress. Once he is in front of them he switches off the rest of the world around him inclusive of me and to demonstrate my heights of insecurity I used to be jealous of computers.
It did not end there when he was studying for his post graduation I banned him from shaking anyone’s hand or giving rides on his bikes to any girl. That poor soul actually did all this not to hurt my feelings.
I did not want him to think, look or even take a girls name and I did not even let him speak to my own best friend.
Over time I have regretted and felt ashamed that we had to have umpteen number of fights over trivial matters like these and spoil our days but it was more out of insecurity than lack of trust in him. But no matter how much I justify my actions I was in the wrong.
When you’re in a relationship there must be ample amount of space for both the partners to do what they want and be how they want. Being in a relationship should not take away their personality or force upon them things they do not want to do in the first place.
He changed me, not through advising me or by going against me but by allowing me to reason out my actions in my own way and I did. I learnt that when you love a person you accept them the way they are and not the way you want them to be. I did that, I wanted him to be someone I had dreamed up somewhere in my mind and when he did not confirm to the person I conjured up I put restrictions on him.
Leave your partner to be how they want to be don’t impose rules or restrictions on them it would just make the relationship all the more harder and less enjoyable to be in. Enjoy their company, love their shortcomings and once in a while it would also help if you can think what you can do for them than thinking what they can do for you.
